Goodbye '09, bring on the '10

If I had to summarize 2009, I would say that thematically it was markedly pleasant, but punctuated by a few definitive personal separations.

It started at the tail end of last year when my great grandmother died. Although she was in her 90s and we all knew it was coming, it was still quite sad. I probably took it the best of most people in our family, but there were still several times this year when I would have dreams about floating through the mobile home in which she used to live. All the furniture was there, but she wasn't. Or I would wake up, and the first thing I would think about was that she was gone, and I wouldn't see her ever again in this life. As much as I believe that death is but a door that leads to something else, once someone dies, there's something flatly undeniable about it that bears such cold finality.

Then there was Mara, the wife of my estranged biological father. She'd begun emailing me on MySpace about a year and a half ago, and I didn't know who she was. I just thought it was some random, middle aged woman being very friendly out of the blue. When my half-brother Gavin emailed me letting me know who he was, it opened the door, and I put the pieces together. It also united me with my half-sisters Lila and LM, the latter with whom I now have a wonderful relationship. I continued my correspondence with Mara after some discussion with my mom, who admitted that Mara had a rather shady history, and told me to be careful. I wanted so much to believe that this person with whom I did not have a blood connection could still be a connecting figure in my life, but as the details unfurled, I learned she was not the person I'd hoped. And I could not continue a relationship, even a harmless online one, with someone who had done the things she'd done and worse, would not even admit it. The fact that after I ceased communication with her, she began a smear campaign against me only confirmed to me what kind of person she was.

And in the most surreal of circumstances, I reunited earlier this year with an old flame, Gideon. We'd had a fast and furious fling back in 2000, and I'd always regretted that we'd parted ways so unceremoniously. I dived in, and emailed him on Facebook, we met up, had good times, and things went from platonic to romantic. But when I tried to make a commitment with him, he just wasn't in it. I'd thought he was the one that got away, but it turns out he just wasn't the one for me.

But this is all blithely depressing, when in fact, most everything else about my year was rather fantastic. I began my new promotional position at work, which, while it entailed some rather heavy projects during the year, also entailed a heftier paycheck. It is definitely nice being able to enjoy a nicer lifestyle.

And the big trip for the year was to Disneyland with my niece Ashley and sister Marie. I hadn't been in well odd fourteen years, and going back with two such dolls was a wonderful treat.

We will be at the End Up on New Year's. Aaron is in town, though LG sadly can't come. I am hoping for much fun, and a happy start to 2010, y'all. I mean, you. Guy. Sssssss.