Chest ruts bloating on an open pyre

Lavern and I are going to NYC in April! I've been dying to go back since I went for the first time in 2007, and it will be her first time going. We are doing it as tourist-y as possible, the double decker bus, tour of Ellis Island, and the requisite musical (I'm thinking "Promises, Promises" featuring Sean Hayes, but primarily because of the "Turkey Lurkey" number with which I'm obsessed on the YouTube).

Last Sunday was a charming holiday din din at the Osha with L Ha and Team Christy where we gossiped, drank, ate, and I dared Team Christy to give our burning hot Thai guy waiter her number (he's been stalking her ever since). I'm thinking, new tradition. We then walked our way to Union Square and took pictures in front of the big Christmas tree like fucking tourists. Endearing.

My Christmas wish this year is for all children to collectively have laryngitis for a week so they can't speak/yell/scream.